This is my 2nd post today!
What a beautiful day. The sun beamed on us all day. We spent several hours at the beach. I enjoyed very nice conversation with my sober friend and watched my children laugh and play with their friends.
I am feeling super! I'm feeling more confident in my abilities to speak with people, including new people without stumbling on my words. I even wore a dress around camp today. (new for me).
One of my friends asked me why I haven't been drinking much and I just said "cause I quit". I simply told her I was tired of feeling like shit and tired of hangovers. I never told her I had a drinking problem and if she figures that out, it honestly doesn't bother me anymore .
From now on, I'm just going to say " I quit! Period" No reasons needed. I just don't want it in my life anymore. I feel fan-bloody-tactic! I'm running over 23 km per week and love the energy in my body.
Now, I know that the last time I felt this great, something or those voices creeped up on me and took me away...out of this world for a night. I don't want to be out of this world anymore. I love being alive and fully aware of all my senses.
I even felt my heartbeat in my head when I was resting in the sun!
Something I know I'll have to deal with is going back to work....stress! Next week I begin in a new classroom with new students. I'm sure I'll be needing my blogging friends advice quite often. I looked forward to my nice glass of wine or nice cold beer at 4 o'clock sharp! I always said they created alcohol for teachers! How do I break that pattern.?
I feel like I got some of it down pat, such as the desire not to drink anymore. I will continue to focus on my sobriety thats for sure. I can only move forward from here! There's no turning back for me man....my car is going forward. I may have to hit some hills once in awhile and slow down but I'm going to go over them eventually.
Goodnight
:)
Glad to have found you! You can totally do this!
ReplyDeleteJen, Seems we have all jumped in Belle's little car for the ride. It is such a powerful visual. Just keep it going forward each day. Thank you for adding me to your list. I am looking forward to catching up with your story.
ReplyDeletethe little car just keeps rolling down hill, slowly gathering speed. don't do anything to disrupt the car :) get enough sleep, eat enough treats. you'll plan a 4 pm treat for the first week of transition back to school. something you can really look forward to all day (salt & vinegar popcorn? turtles? peanut brittle?) and reward yourself every day for a week at 4 pm. i bet by day 4 or 5 you'll forget that you even need it :) go, jen, go :)
ReplyDeleteAlso include some kind of treat for yourself in the evenings after the kids are in bed. What I used to call "the drinking hours". Stay in that car girlie! Be proud of yourself!
ReplyDeleteSherry
You go girl! Well done Jen
ReplyDeleteI am going to try the "I quit" in future instead of all the over explaining (whilst not even really telling the truth anyway) that I have been doing.
You can do it partner!
ReplyDeleteSo glad you had that nice day! Looking forward to hearing about more!
ReplyDelete