Wednesday 25 July 2012

CRAVINGS ARE OVERPOWERING ME!

I'm writing this post because I'm feeling defeated right now. Even though I haven't had a drink in 10 days, the cravings have been terrible for 24 hours now! I could sit here and blame my hubby, who's been driving me nuts or my children, who also have been haywire. I could sit here and pretend that the brand new bottle of red wine in my fridge is for my guest, when they come, but I know I'm fooling myself. I don't feel strong enough to not drink for the rest of my life. I wish I could just have 1 or2 and not want more but I know that's impossible.
I really don't know how to deal with the stress in my body caused by the people in my life and the urges to drink. I am on anti-depressants but they're just not doing the trick! I can't stop crying because the power calling me to have a nice cold glass of booze is extreme right now. I feel miserable with my poor children who don't get why I'm cranky. It's not really fair to them. I'm really surprised I haven't given into temptation, especially last night, after a spat with my hubby. He could be such an asshole!
Anyway, to my blogger friends who have passed day 10, you deserve a friggen medal. I'm sorry if I'll disappoint you very soon. If I do, I wish you the best of luck, full of health and happiness.
Jen




Okay! I'm done feeling sorry for myself. I just read many of your blogs for an hour and learned more about myself and reasons I don't want to drink. Thank God for blogs. Thank you. Your posts are saving my life. I'll stay sober today Day 10

4 comments:

  1. You are saving your own life Jen by writing and reading and working really hard to retrain your brain to beat a very difficult addiction. That booze, it calls to us and tricks us into thinking it makes life better. It doesn't! I am rooting for you xxx

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  2. All I can say is HANG IN THERE! I'm only on day six, so to me your an inspiration! Ten days will see me through my first weekend without alcohol in forever...

    Your doing well, just read other stories and you'll see that it's okay if its not easy. Reasons not to drink... There are so damn many. Be good to yourself.

    Got a kindle or something? Get onto amazon and get Jason vales book kick the drink..easily. Thats got me so fired up!

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  3. go, jen, go! and i think crying is totally fine, and necessary. you're releasing stress and frustration, and you're grieving a bit. this transition is irritating and hard. but that doesn't mean it's not worthwhile :)

    i had the exact same experience on day 12 (https://tiredofthinkingaboutdrinking.wordpress.com/2012/07/12/crying-seems-to-help/) and i got some lovely support in the comments.

    and just like you, at my weakest moments, I went and read blogs and read my own blogs again, and posted comments, and just waited. And the feelings passed.

    there's a pink cloud coming in a few days - a really great high feeling of strength. It's worth waiting to see how that feels, promise :) hugs from the cyberworld :)

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  4. Thank you so much. I got goosebumps after reading your comments today. I'm doing good....still one day at a time. I will look into getting that book for sure.
    Luv ya all so much. Xxoo
    I will have to read up on the pink cloud subject....send me more info if you can. I'd love to be on one soon!
    Jen

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